am an I unmarried woman, about 48 years in age. I am currently working as a school principal. A cousin of mine is a gynaecologist, and a few days back, a girl came from delivery, in her hospital and her old father was with her. Her husband had died a few months back, so did she after giving birth to a baby boy. Her father refused to take the child in his custody, for he is too old to look after the child. Thus, it should be given to a family which can care for it properly. The baby was given to a nurse for a few days. The nurse got worried when people started handing her thousands of rupees for the sake of raising the child. She wanted to hand over the baby to the right people. Understanding the situation I adopted the child. What I need to know is whose name should I write as the child’s surname for I do not know the name of the father and I have to get the registration form from NADRA. My own ID card is connected to my brothers family and a family number is needed to connect the child. It is important because the baby is now 25 days old and still needs to get registered in the UNION COUNCIL.
We believe that the religion obligation in this regard is simple and easy to follow. We must not hide the lineage of the adopted children. Now the situation here is not that we are trying to hide something. You are trying to fine out the name of the real father and just want to register the baby. The best way is just to follow the legal requirements of the state and discuss the issue…
If parents force their son to give divorce to his wife and under the pressure he gives divorce, is it valid?
The divorce is the exclusive right of the husband. He has to consider all the consequences before issuing a divorce. The final decision is his and he is responsible for issuing a divorce. There can be many types of pressures applied on him. Unless he is forced to the point that his senses no more work and he does not know what he is doing or he is compelled under life threat his decision…
Sir, if a husband gives conditional divorce to his wife, like for example he says that if you go outside the country without my permission you will be divorced but allows her to leave after a few days, but due to other factors the husband seems to be dissatisfied with the wife and does not come to see her off when she leaves. Now the wife seems to claim that he was not happy with her so the divorce is effective. Is this statement right or wrong?
The husband had the right to revoke his decision. He has used his right. Now the wife cannot claim that if he is not happy the divorce is final. If there is a dispute between as the wife insists on her stance the best she could do is to turn to the court of law. She cannot just decide that she is divorced because her husband did not see her off.
My question is regarding Sila Rehmi.
My father divorced my mother 30 years ago and I was only seventeen at the time. I have two brothers and a sister, they were younger thus I had to bring them up. I had managed to bear all the expenses for their necessities and education. My sister got married and I also had my hand in arranging my brothers’ marriages. Their wives have good relations with me and my wife too. Both me and my wife have tried our best to serve my mother after our marriage and remained at their beck and call. Moreover, instead of spending my money on my family I used it to serve my mother and brothers.
Currently, my mother, brothers and my sister are angry with me and my mother is living in the new house my brothers have got. Many people from our family have tried to help but neither of them are reinstating the terms. They are all hard at hearts, especially my mother and sister, and they tell lies against me and my wife in the society and relatives. Should I tell others that they are the people who are lying or should I remain quiet. I long for my mother’s forgiveness even though I am not at fault here, but she does not agree. And in this distressing situation, what should I do?
I had also remained away from my father on the request of my mother but now I have apologized and am at friendly terms with him.
assalam o alaykum
I am sorry to hear your plight. From what I learn from your account of the affair you are doing your best to maintain the good relations and have done great sacrifices. May Allah reward you for the good work and pure intentions. We ourselves or our relatives at times get distorted a distorted picture of something, we get influenced by wrong information, we are affected by our emotions which may…
I am a high school senior and Inshallah I shall be looking be forward for majoring in nursing after high school. I was wondering if it is haram for me while working to be touching male patients, which includes washing, bathing and feeding them. I really want to help as much people as I can. I just want to know is it not permitted for I will be working in the USA. I am very confused because some sites tell me it is permitted for emergencies and some say it is not. Thank you and Jazak-Allah khair.
Although the Shari'ah has not specifically prohibited touching the opposite sex's body, however in line with the concept of Haya (modesty) and avoiding fitna (evil) one should refrain from this where it is possible.
If you are working in an environment where it is possible to avoid touching the body of the male patients or it is possible to arrange a plan so that you do not need to do this, then…
I am in dire need of help. I have a friend who has been going through a gender identity disorder for a very long time. We used to make fun of her when she dressed up as a boy and when she had facial and bodily hair quite like a boys. Then we went to study in different institutes. Now just recently I met her in a hospital because she is suffering from a severe depression. She says she feels trapped in her body and she has never felt like a girl. She made all the hormone tests and the results showed that there are too many male hormones in her body and this condition according to the doctor developed in her brain and body at the time when she was in her mother's womb. The treatment as per the doctors is either one of the following. The first treatment being her taking the hormone therapy for the rest of her life and not being able to conceive if she gets married and there will be some side effects, all this is just so that her body can look like a female's body. Or she undergoes the gender change surgery and takes male hormones for maybe a year or two and then without any side effects live her life normally as a boy with the exception that she won’t be able to become a father and she will also attain mental peace. She is in the state of disturbance and extreme pain because she has hormonal imbalance and it is not normal and she requires a treatment as soon as possible. My question is under such conditions is it allowed in Islam to undergo the sex change surgery? What is the ruling in such exceptional cases? Please help my friend because she wants the surgery but she doesn't know if it is allowed or not. I will be waiting for your reply. I hope you will take out some time and answer back as soon as possible.
Islam has not given us any direct advice about the cases similar to what you described. This is left to our common sense and rationality that should be applied based on the spirit of Islam.
The way you describe this case, to me this is as simple as having someone with a twisted arm to go through surgery to fix his arm. No one with his right mind would argue that since this person…
Could you please elaborate how it is to have paintings with figures in the house. I have a few figurative pieces which don't have features but just figures with dark faces and no features on face. Is it alright to have such stuff in the house in the light of Islam? We also have a few family pictures.
We believe that the art of photography and portrait making is not prohibited in the Shari’ah. The hadith narratives usually presented to establish the prohibition of the art are specific and restricted to the portraits which were associated with the practice of polytheism. Since the element is no more found in for example family pictures or other pieces of art these cannot be validly declared prohibited. There is nothing wrong with keeping the family pictures…
As sexual promiscuity and its bad effects cross all bounds, the British government has introduced a new program which teaches the youngsters to adopt safe sex and encourages them on using the required tools. Where does this step by the government stand on the scale of morality?
When a culture has refused to consider free sex a vice they have come to face the necessary consequences. This is the very issue which marks the prominent difference between us, the Muslims, and the western culture. We believe that man needs a family. Man cannot do without the family and relations. He direly needs relations. He starts his life from a feeble stage after birth. After going through different phases of life, he enters…
My question is regarding the ownership of dowry.
Who is the actual owner of dowry items (including furniture, ornaments, crockery etc) that the bride's parents gift her in wedding?
Who is the actual owner of ornaments that a bride receive from her in-laws in wedding?
Does the husband or the in-laws has any right on the dowry items? does the husband has any right to gift them to his family without concerning his wife's will?
Hope your answers will help me erase my confusions.
Since the dowry items are gifted to the bride these are exclusively her possession. She is also the rightful owner of the items gifted to her by her in-laws. When we gift something to another person we actually transfer its ownership to that person. According to the Shari`ah nobody including her husband enjoys any right on the possessions of the bride and can no way gift or lend it to any party without the consent…
Do you think it is a good practice to reward a child, for instance, for performing his obligatory prayers, because one fears that otherwise the child would neglect his prayers?
To my mind, at some instances it may be quite acceptable to reward a child if one is reassured that the child wouldn't develop an incorrect attitude.
Should one completely refrain from this idea, how do you view this matter?
In my opinion it is certainly a desired act to hearten our children on doing such acts. It is very likely to develop in them habit of performing religious obligations. It is incumbent upon us to prepare our children to become true believers who perform all their religious obligations with eagerness. Therefore we should often encourage them on doing so and reward them occasionally.
I have committed sins before marriage. I regret the act now. I always pray to Allah and ask forgiveness. I am married to my cousin who had all the bad habits and he had an illicit child from an English lady. I had a daughter and she died. He was going with another English lady who gave birth to another child of his. Now I have a daughter. She is one month now. My husband went on holiday with his girlfriend and daughter. He knows that I know everything and I tried to say don't do these things, think about your afterlife. But he is not listening to me. What should I do?
I am always reluctant to give specific advice about personal cases, because often I am not aware of all the details.
My following suggestion is based on my understanding of the information that you provided:
If you have already advised your husband and he has rejected your advice then I suggest you threaten him that at the first stage you will going to complain about him to those relatives or friends who while keeping it as a…
Is it mandatory for a Muslim girl to marry if she is not taking any initiative and not showing interest to marry and she is mature to decide about her life? Please advise. This is a common problem now a day in todays' Pakistani society.
God has created man and woman for each other and for each to get comfort and peace in this world. This is a great blessing of the Almighty for us, however like His other worldly blessings, we are free to take it or to make ourselves deprived from it.
Deciding not to marry is certainly not a sin, however it will be denying ourselves of one of the most significant blessings of the Almighty. A…
Could you please comment on the ḥadīth mentioned below? While there is such a great emphasis on freeing a slave, and on the principle of equality, how can be a human being required to submit himself as property of another human? Could you clarify its validity in the modern world? I find religion to be close to my heart, however this makes me wonder.
Here is the text of the Hadith:
ثلاثة لا تقبل لهم صلاة ولا ترفع لهم إلى السماء حسنة : العبد الآبق حتى يرجع , والمرأة الساخط عليها زوجها حتى يرضى , والسكران حتى يصحو
The ṣalāh of three is not acceptable nor any good deeds do rises to the heavens: a) a runaway slave until he returns to the master, b) a woman incurring anger of her husband until the latter is pleased and c)…
I have been separated for ten months before getting khul‘ah. What is the duration of my iddah? Secondly I am a working woman what should be my life style?
Khul'ah is nothing but a request from the wife and a demand from her to be divorced. Now it is the man who decides whether he issues one divorce (which is the way one should adopt) two divorces or three divorces. If it was simply a single divorce then the divorce can be revoked. If two again it can be revoked. If three then it cannot be revoked. Keeping this in consideration we can say…
Is there any way, any prayer or something we do, to get the life partner of our own choice?
We believe that we must not look for the supernatural means and wazifahs for the purpose. We just need to use our mind and intellect and our social knowledge and connections and keep praying to God to help us reach a sound decision. There is no such prayer that can guarantee success. For at times Allah Almighty does not accept our prayers because they do not accord to the test and trial He has set…
The Almighty Allah has decided and announced in the Qur’an that the whole mankind is a single nation. The Almighty further says that it is only Mushriks (polytheists) who are bad. He also explains that lowly and illegitimate are those who are disobedient and haughty. In spite of all this clarification whole of the Muslim society is going against the decision of the Almighty. They term many human beings as "kamīn" (lowly). They do not allow them to be known with their tribe name. We have therefore in our society classes of people like blacksmiths, carpenters etc. We refer to the people by these names derogatively. Isn’t it following Hindu caste system? This situation becomes more terrible when we see that not even a single sect, scholar or religious party notices this issue. I think all the sects like Shia, Brelvi, Ahl-e-hadith, Dew-bandi etc. are unanimous on this base custom.
I believe you are very clear on the teachings of the Qur'an on the subject. You are also clear on the moral stance in this regard. However, I believe scholars of all sects hold that it is unjust to consider someone lowly on the basis of their caste or profession. All the scholars from all the sects hold that it is only taqwa that is measure of eminence and excellence.
However, they do not engage…
I wanted to ask what is the role of clerics in nikah because no verse of the Quran is necessary to be recited in the ceremony. Yet we see even the People of the Book like Christians and Jews make rabbis and fathers present in a marriage. It is just a tradition or is it religious obligation? I heard in one of Javed Ghamidi Sahib’s lectures that nikah is acceptance of both parties. So why do we call clerics, fathers and rabbis to conduct the nikah?
In the Islamic Shari'ah nikah is accomplished when an adult male and female with thier open and free consent declare in the open that they are entering marriage bond. The presene of the cleric is not binding. It does not affect the marriage if two indidividuals gather their friends and family and accounce this. However, in our culture we try to keep the spirit of the open declaration and also try to involve the religious…
I want to ask whether just thinking over the divorce words with the intention of trying to remember whether I used them or not anytime makes divorce effective without speaking up the words?
All the concepts that are consummated only be external execution like social and legal contract are enforced only and only when they are executed in the form they are known by the others. Merely mulling over these things and considering them in the mind does not make them effective. This is true of talaaq as well.
I got married with a girl in a court according to UK marriage law. I just want to know is it acceptable in Islam. Or I have to do it in Islamic way as well. What should I do? I really need your help. I am so scared that I might not be committing zina.
The marriage conducted in this way fulfills the basic requirements for validity of an acceptable marriage in Islam. The two conditions are: a) consent of the adult partners and b) open declaration of the marriage. Your relation is legal. There is no need for you to repeat the marriage ceremony in the Mosque.
Mr Ghamidi believes that husband can remarry his ex-wife after the epxiry of iddah. I cannot understand how after the expiry of iddah following a sinlge or tripple talaq the husband can marry the divorced wife? Isn’t the allowance to take back the wife restricted during the iddah?
The iddah is no doubt three menstrual cycles in both the cases, ie one talaq or three talaqs. If one gives one talaq and the three months iddah passes he still has the right to remarry the woman. The only difference that occurs due to the expiry of iddah is that the woman is free. She will have her say and the right to approval. The man cannot revoke the talaq on his own. But…