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Family Planning And Predestination

It has been stated by the Qur’an (7:172) that Allah took covenant from all the human beings, from Adam to the last man to come before the Last Day. Does this mean that the number of human beings to is already set? If yes then why do people try to upset this divine plan? Why do they take precautionary measures and do abortions etc.? If their number is not fixed then how can we interpret this verse?

Answer:

According to the Qur'an all the people were presented before the Lord and were made to enter the referred to covenant. They included all the people to come before the Last Day. This means that we cannot add to or subtract the total number of human beings.

However, this number was known to Allah Almighty alone. Human do not know this. Just as we try to treat a disease and do not know whether a…

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Adoption In Islam

Is adoption allowed in Islam? What will happen to orphans if adoption is not allowed?

Answer:

We can of course adopt children, orphaned or others. However, the Holy Qur’an requires us to call the adopted child with the name of his/her real fathers. The child adopted in infancy and suckled can only be given names of the adopting person on the basis of the fact that adopting family becomes foster parents. We know that fostering renders a child within the haram relations (they cannot marry within the family.



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Divorce During Pregnancy And Baby Shower

My husband divorced me during pregnancy. Is he allowed to do that?

Is it haram to find out the sex of the baby doing an ultrasound?
Is it haram to have a baby shower?

Answer:

Thank you for writing to us. One can divorce his wife during the pregnancy. However, in this case the iddah will extend to the birth of the child. It will not remain confined to three menstrual cycles (which discontinue during this time) or three months. We believe there is nothing wrong with finding the sex of the baby. Nor is there any problem with the baby shower.



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Social Networking

What is the status of usage of the Facebook? Are we allowed to use it?

Answer:

We do not find any religious ruling against the use of facebook or any other social networking platform. However, evil is not allowed to be spread and practiced in any manner and in any platform.



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Parental Approval For Marrying A Convert

One female accpeted islam by seeking certain religious knowledge from me. After few years we planned to marry each other. Her non-Muslim parents are opposing. My parents are too much opposing. This marriage is the only scope for her to live as a Muslim and both of us wish to live together in the path of Allah. After knowing a female for six years, if my parents are not allowing to marry a converted Muslim, who will marry. Please provide your answer in the light of Islam. I want to make my parents comprehend. Is it sinful to disobey parents in this issue? If my parents object what can I do. Already we have postponed our marriage due to these issues for two years. More than a year or two we can’t wait also. If my parents accept and her parents rejet what can be done, within the light of Islam. Please provide your answer in the light provided by the Prophet (sws).

Answer:

You have done your best in convincing your parents and if they do accept your choice while the girl's parents do not then she is not bound to follow their wish in this regard. However, both you and she must contemplate the consequences of a social boycott by her parents.

Religiously, however, you have all the liberty to take this decision even if your own parents do not agree.



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Sex Education

What does Islam say about sex education? Is it allowable? If yes what is the guideline regarding it.

Answer:

Islam leaves this matter to common sense and experience and does not lay down any specific course for this.



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Homosexual Orientation

I am a homosexual. I never committed fornication but have talked ludity to a person of same sex in disguise. Now I am very much sorry about my mistake and I have done sincere repentance. I have taken oath to never commit something like that. However it is a fact that I have been attached to person with whom I talked fawaahish in disguise. I can't leave her. She too loves to talk about these things to me. I want to make myself and her a better human. We hve started offering prayers and reading the Qur’an together. We have also started offering tahajjud and other good things too. Can we be forgiven? Can I be with her without committing any adultery or without getting into any attraction? Will I be forgiven by Allah?

Answer:

You need to ask God's forgiveness for what you have done in the past. Alhamdulillah, you are already doing this as you have written. Hopefully God will forgive you inshallah.

You may accompany your friend in worship but it would be wise to avoid spending time together alone. You should pray and read the Qur'an at your own places.



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Dilemma Of The Muslim Immigrants

I am an immigrant to USA who has settled here for the last thirty years. I have raised my family here. We were not the very strict family, but followed Islam in every way and raised our children, who were also good in understanding and following the religion. Since we were in a small town, the exposure to other good Muslim families was limited. Now that we have a larger Muslim group and have an Islamic Center, things are different. They have studied Islam and the Qur'an and completely understood that this is the right way.

But during this time the children have grown up and have left for colleges, out of town. It is there that we saw problems, and now it seems that the children have abandoned the religion and become openly agnostics. We are very much devastated by it and after trying hard through family, through talks, meetings with the imam, and with Islamic scholars, all attempts have failed. Right now all we have is prayers and hope for the mercy of Allah, that He shall guide these kids back. We have also informed them that the non-Muslim children are not part of the family and will be out of touch and on their own, in addition to disinherit them as well.
Now, we are looking for any help that will provide some guidance for us to redirect these unfortunate kids back to the religion and save them from the fire of Hell.
I am not sure, if this is what is written in the fate, or the effect of this society, pressures from the peers, or what, it may be that we kept them in strict control, and when they got out of the house, it happened. But whatever may be the reason, now we are faced with this situation, and seek help from your esteem resources.

Answer:

I can understand your concern on the issue. It is indeed very unfortunate that your children have practically left the religion they follow and have forgotten the tradition they belong to. At the same time it is very encouraging that you have grasped the gravity of the matter and are concerned with the present state of affairs. It is indeed lack of objective education and aggressive indoctrination that leaves the people in doubt regarding what…

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Reformation Of Marriage

I really need some help. I have been married for 9 years. Just recently my husband has changed a lot. His attitude has become very devilish. He enjoys playing music, drinking, being on facebook, talking to women etc. He told me he is not attracted to me anymore and is very distant and horrible. I am trying my best to be nice and save the marriage. I really need a wazifa or prayer (dua) to bring back the man I married who had a lot of love in his heart for me. He says he loves me, but he has distanced himself so much from me that he does not see beyond that.

Answer:

This is indeed a sorry state of affairs. Perhaps you can use the services of a third party who has influence on him. As for your own self is concerned, there is a suggestion which may be very difficult for you, but there is a slight chance that it might improve matters. Besides praying very hard to Allah, try to become a model wife for at least one month. In fact, given your condition, you…

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Dealing With Internal Family Issues

I have a big problem in my life and I cannot discuss it with anyone. I am 19 years old. I am confiding this to you because I have been assured that anything I tell you will not be displayed to anyone else. My father is in his 60s. He has a severe anger problem. Since childhood I have seen my father yell at my mother frequently just for minor things. He is very aggressive. Two years ago he got so angry that he even hit her. He hit her one day and the next day he promised that he would not do it again. This year in May he hit her again. I was having my final exams and so I was very depressed and because he had promised not to hit again so I got angry. I said a few things which I should not have. He hit her the next day too. The thing is that I have been having nightmares since then. I wake up in the middle of the night thinking that he hit her again. And then I cannot sleep. I am scared of my father. He is always angry. My head is hurting all the time. What do I need to do?

Answer:

This is indeed a very disturbing scenario. May God guide your father to control his anger. Actually, the situation needs to be addressed at both levels: how to deal with such a father, and how to cope with the mental pressure caused.

As far as the first is concerned, please see if you can involve some elder of the family and confide in him and request him/her to talk to your father. You yourself can…

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Shariah Ruling Regarding Satr

What is the minimum limit of satr in Islam for Muslim men and women?

Answer:

Satr is a term coined by our jurists. It refers to those parts of the body which must remain covered.

According to these jurists the satr of man is from his naval to his knees and that of a woman includes all her body except her face, hands and feet.


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Breastfeeding An Adult

I would like to ask a question with reference to a hadith quoted below:

Zainab daughter of Abu Salama reported: I heard Umm Salama, the wife of Allah's Apostle (May peace be upon him) saying to 'Aisha: By Allah, I do not like to be seen by a young boy who has passed the period of fosterage, whereupon she ('Aisha) said: Why is it so? Sahla daughter of Suhail came to Allah's Messenger (May peace be upon him) and said: Allah's Messenger, I swear by Allah that I see in the face of Abu Hudhaifa (the signs of disgust) on account of entering of Salim (in the house), whereupon Allah's Messenger (May peace be upon him) said: Suckle him. She (Sahla bint Suhail) said: He has a heard. But he (again) said: Suckle him, and it would remove what is there (expression of disgust) on the face of Abu Hudhaifa. She said: (I did that) and, by Allah, I did not see (any sign of disgust) on the face of Abu Hadhaifa.
I would like to ask how this Sahabiah Sahla Bint Suhail had breastfed this man as it is mentioned he was an adult. How did he suck from her breast? Could the Prophet command an act which seems to be very discomforting for Salim was not an infant?

Answer:

This does not necessarily mean that she directly breastfed Salim, Mawla of Abu Huzayfah. One clear possibility is that she would have taken the milk out from her breast into a cup and then this was given to Salim.



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Breastfeeding An Adult

I would like to ask a question with reference to a hadith quoted below:

Zainab daughter of Abu Salama reported: I heard Umm Salama, the wife of Allah's Apostle (May peace be upon him) saying to 'Aisha: By Allah, I do not like to be seen by a young boy who has passed the period of fosterage, whereupon she ('Aisha) said: Why is it so? Sahla daughter of Suhail came to Allah's Messenger (May peace be upon him) and said: Allah's Messenger, I swear by Allah that I see in the face of Abu Hudhaifa (the signs of disgust) on account of entering of Salim (in the house), whereupon Allah's Messenger (May peace be upon him) said: Suckle him. She (Sahla bint Suhail) said: He has a heard. But he (again) said: Suckle him, and it would remove what is there (expression of disgust) on the face of Abu Hudhaifa. She said: (I did that) and, by Allah, I did not see (any sign of disgust) on the face of Abu Hadhaifa.
I would like to ask how this Sahabiah Sahla Bint Suhail had breastfed this man as it is mentioned he was an adult. How did he suck from her breast? Could the Prophet command an act which seems to be very discomforting for Salim was not an infant?

Answer:

This does not necessarily mean that she directly breastfed Salim, Mawla of Abu Huzayfah. One clear possibility is that she would have taken the milk out from her breast into a cup and then this was given to Salim.



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Rights Of Siblings

Duties and rights of a man towards his parents, wife and children are specifically spelled out in the Qur'an, Sunnah and Ahadith. Are there such specific instructions regarding spinster sisters in the absence of parents? The social norms and the call of conscience are well understood and appreciated.

Answer:

Human beings have acknowledged rights of the brothers and sisters from the inception of human society. Islamic religious sources have taken this responsibility for granted and the Holy Qur’an only referred to this in the following words:

يَا أَيُّهَا النَّاسُ اتَّقُواْ رَبَّكُمُ الَّذِي خَلَقَكُم مِّن نَّفْسٍ وَاحِدَةٍ وَخَلَقَ مِنْهَا زَوْجَهَا وَبَثَّ مِنْهُمَا رِجَالاً كَثِيراً وَنِسَاء وَاتَّقُواْ اللّهَ الَّذِي تَسَاءلُونَ بِهِ وَالأَرْحَامَ إِنَّ اللّهَ كَانَ عَلَيْكُمْ رَقِيبًا

O mankind! Be careful of your duty to your Lord…

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Repeating The Nikah

My husband and I entered into marriage contact a few years ago in the presence of my parents. We kept it secret from my in-laws for they were against our marriage. Now they have agreed. Can we contract a new nikah in their presence? I also fear that if they found out the truth they will disown us, and probably not accept me.

Answer:

I understand that you married a person with consent of your parents and against the will of the parents of your husband who still do not know anything regarding this matter due to their being away or because of your keeping the relationship secret. If you have kept the nikah secret from the society of which the parents of your husband are part then you have indeed transgressed the Shariah laws which requires that…

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Marrying A Jewish Girl

I live in Canada and I have almost decided to marry a Jewish girl. She belongs to Reformed Judaism and more like the Jewish traditions than actually practicing Judaism. I am a practicing Muslim in regards to praying, fasting etc. and I strive to be better. I have been living in Canada for almost five years now. I grew up in Pakistan. She is forty and I am thirty-eight years old. We have known each other for almost three years. We connect on many levels and then there are other places where we differ a lot. That is mainly cultural and some religious differences. We have gone through a lot of discussions and I feel that as long as its only me and her in the picture I will inshaAllah be able to be content with my decision of marrying her, despite realizing the fact that there will be obstacles and more effort will be required in this relationship than having a traditional marriage with a Muslim girl. When it comes to kids, we fail to reach a common resolution as our differences look bigger in that scenario. Just to give you an example, I think a sexual relationship can only be after marriage (based on my religious beliefs and cultural practice) and she thinks that in western culture it is not possible and as long as one can remain faithful to their partner (unmarried) they should be able to spend their lives as they want. She thinks kids could be given knowledge of both Jewish and Muslim traditions and I think they will be confused that way so they should be raised in one tradition and I want them to be Muslims and she does not want the kids to only associate to Islam but Judaism as well. So we do not have an agreement there. She is already forty, so there may be complications in having kids altogether. She also thinks that at this stage of her life and given the situation she does not want to have kids. I love her and try to make every effort so that we can get married. I have also thought about not having kids. The dominant thought is to be able to live with her and I guess that is why I try to justify this thought by feeling that it is already late for me as well to have a traditional marriage cycle where one gets married at a younger age and have kids. I am also behind in my career path and need more time and effort to work hard and establish myself. So I feel that kid will be a huge responsibility. The main reason behind this thought of not having kids remain to be the fact that it will complicate our lives as we might not even be able to get married if we decided to get married. I feel that she and I will be able to do other stuff in life that will help us not to miss having kids. For example she and I are very keen towards bringing Jews and Muslims closer and helping both sides understand that there are so many misunderstandings and misconceptions and lack of trust that is the cause of lot of friction between Jews and Muslims. I would like your comments on the whole situation and my main question would be, in the given situation, if I decide not to have kids, will it be just according to Islam?

Answer:

In principle, according to the Qur'an, a Muslim man may marry a woman from the people of the book, although according to Javed Ahmad Ghamidi, the wording and the context of the verse that gives this permission is given with an assumption that is:

"It was expected that if Muslim men would marry among the People of the Book these women would be positively influenced by Islam. In this way not only would there be no…

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Rituals For The Widow

Could you give some direction as to the Islamic ritual on a woman after the death of her husband?

Answer:

The widows have to observe the following directives of the Shari`ah during the waiting period:

They do not get married for four months. (Al-Baqarah 2: 228) If a woman is pregnant, the waiting period is extended to the birth of the child. (Al-Talaq 65: 6). This extension is because the women actually feel it real hard to find themselves alone and go through a great mental stress and sense of loss. This is the…

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Advising Parents

I have come to know that my parents are involved in harām earnings. I have tried to explain it to them but they didn’t accept my arguments. I am staying away from my parents for my studies. They send me money for my needs. This puts me into dilemma to recognize whether this money is harām or halāl. What they send might partially or fully contain this harām.

Answer:

It is a very a cherished act to be alive to the requirements of the Shari`ah. But when it comes to the situation similar to one you are facing one needs to carefully handle the problem. We are required by the Almighty to put such exhortations before others very politely and very wisely. Especially dealing with your parents is a very sensitive matter. You are required by the Almighty to be very polite and respectful…

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Permission Of Polygamy

The verse in Sura al-Nisa mentioning the four marriages, mentions the orphans initially. These verses were revealed after the battle of Uhud concerning the widows and orphans of the martyrs. Does this in itself not precondition the permission of polygamy to the widows and orphans?

Answer:

The verses in question donor give a command. Polygamy has always existed since the advent of civilisation. The idea that Qur’an introduced polygamy is wrong. In reality, Qur’an did not forbid it.

These verses were actually suggesting the solution to an acute crisis. A lot of widows were recently married and had young children. The Qur’an merely suggested the prevalent custom of polygamy to provide social stability for those in question. It also applied certain…

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Relinquishing The Mahr

There is a common social custom that the mahr (dower), whether stated or not is relinquished by the bride. However I did so by my free will. My husband, in spite of that, gifted it to me. Can I use it?

Answer:

Let me explain a few things. Religion has advised us to implement some of its commandments according to the prevailing social values. It is not necessary to follow the original practice. Mahr is a religious statute. It is a right of the wife and an obligation on the husband. If she relinquished her right, then it was her graciousness. If he still fulfilled it, then it was due of his chivalry. Now she may use…

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